How to lose kids and murder kittens

I wrap myself in a towel, walk out of the bathroom and my brain can’t make sense of what’s in front of me. 

I see cars covered in snow. 

I feel the freezing wind blowing in. 

Then I realise the front door of the house is wide open. 

I shout for my daughter, 

“Alice! Alice!!”

No answer. 

A cold hand squeezes my heart.

We came to London to visit the Harry Potter Studios, that was her surprise birthday present, and we stayed the night at a friends’ place. 

They’ve all left for the day. 

Alice was playing with their two cats while I had a quick shower before flying home. 

I run down the stairs and my thoughts race ahead: 

Did someone get in? How? Did she leave? Why would she leave?? Where would she go?!?

And the one I’m not strong enough to consider: 

What if I lost her?

As soon as I turn into the living room, I see one of the cats, Poppy, sitting on top of the armchair. 

Alice is not on the floor where they were playing. Then I hear, 

“Hey, dad.”

She’s on the other side of the room, sitting on the sofa and watching TV.  

“Alice! Why is the front door open??”

“I don’t know, I didn’t open it, I swear! I’ve been here the whole time.”

The voices in my head go quiet.

But then I notice the other cat is not with her. I don’t see him anywhere. 

“Where’s Pickles?”

“I don’t know. He was here a moment go.”

Oh no. 

Just last night my friend’s youngest son told me about the terrible luck they’ve had with cats: 

“One got sick and died, the other ran out of the house and got run over. That’s why we are super careful never to let them out of the house.”

I try to imagine telling that kid we lost his cat and I just can’t. 

I’m still wrapped in a towel. It’s snowing outside. I don’t know what to do. 

I hesitate for a moment, then I close the door and tell Alice, 

“We need to find Pickles. Start looking!”

I check every corner of the kitchen. I run down to the basement. I look in the bathroom knowing there’s no reason the cat will be there. 

I’m about to get dressed and go outside when I hear Alice shout, 

“I found him, he’s under the bed!”

I rush into my friend’s bedroom, get down and see a grey pillow. It looks like the cat–but it isn’t. 

Then I see where she’s pointing at. 

It’s Pickles. Hidden in a corner, making himself as small as he can. 

Then I remember my friend telling me that cat was terrified of the outside and never wanted to leave the house. 

I breathe out. 

I get dressed. 

On our way to the airport, I hug my daughter until she asks me to stop. 

I don’t. 

Don’t talk about your feelings 

I’ve told you before that one of the easiest ways to tell a great story is to constantly answer these two questions:  

• How did it look like? 

• What did you feel? 

And that’s very much true, but here’s an important distinction about that second point: 

Amateurs talk about their feelings - pros feel them. Instead of naming what you feel, describe the physical sensation (metaphors are ok), or the action that accompanies that feeling. 

For example: 

“I was confused” -> “My brain can’t make sense of what’s in front of me”

“I felt panic” -> “A cold hand squeezes my heart”

“I calm down” -> “The voices in my head go quiet” and later “I breathe out”

“The cat looks scared” -> “Making himself as small as he can”

“I feel relief my daughter is safe but I’m still shaken” -> “I hug my daughter until she asks me to stop. I don’t.”

Naming feelings is fine. Just doing that makes a story a lot more relatable. 

But whenever you can, feel your feelings instead of telling us about them. 

Then we won’t just understand them–we’ll feel them too 🤘

-Francisco 

Whenever you're ready, there are 3 ways I can help you:

1. Getting clarity through your story to stand out from all the other coaches, speakers and entrepreneurs out there 

2. If you dream of speaking on the Red Dot, take this Scorecard and instantly discover how likely your idea is to be accepted by a TED-style organizing committee

3. If you (or your team) got any storytelling challenges, I’m sure there’s something we can do together ;-)

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