The truth is... you'd be better off facing a shark

I’m making lunch when I hear my daughter ask, 

“Mom, are there sharks in Barcelona?”

Alice loves to swim. We can hardly get her out of the water when we’re at the beach, so I immediately think “Say no. The only answer is no. Please.”

“Yes, there are some sharks here,” my wife says. 

Damnit. 

“Really? Sharks in Barcelona?? Are you sure, mom?”

I run to the living room but not before Patricia doubles down: 

“Yes, I’m sure, there are sharks everywhere.”

I just about throw myself between the two of them and say, 

“Baby, don’t listen to your mom, there are no sharks in Barcelona, you don’t need to worry about it.”

“But there are!” 

I turn around and gesticulate for Patricia to shush. Her look back says I’ll be paying for that later. 

I face Alice again with the most serene smile I can manage and tell her, 

“What your mom means is that very very rarely, a shark gets lost, swims closer to Barcelona but all the way out in the ocean, nowhere near anybody. You can still enjoy the sea when we go to be beach, baby, you got nothing to be afraid of”

“Are you sure, dad?”

“Of course. I’m afraid of sharks too, and I swim super deep. I wouldn’t do that if I thought there was a shark out there, right? 

“I guess. Alright. Ok.”

I can see her shoulders relax. I think we dodged this bullet. 

But now I’m the one who’s nervous. The only thing scarier than a shark is realising that, in my family… 

I’m the sensible one 😅

Some truths… 

I’m going to wade into dangerous waters here, but it needs to be said: if you want to get your message across, you need to realise that “truth”… is not an absolute thing 🫣

I don’t mean that everyone can have their facts, or pick and choose what evidence to believe in. What I do mean is that some things might be factually true–but they don’t feel like it. 

And often, what feels true is more important than what is true. 

…Are truthier than others

Take the situation above: are there sharks in Barcelona? Technically, yes. There are some species of sharks in the Mediterranean, which are mostly small and harmless, but these rarely come anywhere near bathers. Can you find a bigger, more dangerous shark? Well, yes, that is possible, but exceedingly rare. 

Is my daughter asking about the factual truth about sharks? No. She just wants to know “Do I have to worry about sharks in Barcelona?” – and the answer there is no, she doesn’t. 

You need to share a common truth with your audience, otherwise your message just won’t land (usually a truth about the problem they face and why they can’t solve it yet). If what you are saying is factually true but doesn’t feel true, there will be a disconnection. 

Understand what their truth is, meet them where they’re at and only then you can take them where they need to go. 

Otherwise you’ll get a colder reaction than a stupid husband who shushes his wife.

And the truth is…

You’d be better off facing a shark 🤘

-Francisco 

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